The same people tended to go on this site a lot, and so I got to know some of them. We talked and talked, and eventually we felt impelled to meet in person. And we did. And we had a great time. Sometimes our dates would just involve going to a restaurant, and sometimes there would be some mild fooling around afterward. But one thing was very very common after the date - too common in fact. They stopped calling. Or I would. Or we both would. But there was RARELY if ever a second date.

So because I these guys stopped calling me, I felt like they were just being jerks. Maybe there was some logic to that too, but I’m not sure. You see, I felt that since the majority of them seemed to have a good time on a date with me, that they must have been dishonest because they didn’t call me back.

And the more I thought about it, the angrier I got. I talked to other about how unfair it was that these guys were somehow mistreating me.

Now here is a question for you: Were these guys being jerks? My response is probably. Some of them may not have been trying to be jerks, but a lot of them I would say were inconsiderate. One thing I have learned over time is that people are frequently inconsiderate. I have also learned that sometimes I am inconsiderate.

Sometimes my anger would consume me at night. I would lie in bed and find it nearly impossible to go to sleep because I would be awake thinking about these “horrible, mean-spirited, worthless jerks!” Can you tell that I was a bit bitter? J

Over the next few weeks, I will write some posts that talk about the differences between love and judgment. I’m not going to say that love is the opposite of judgment, but I will say that we often give judgment freely when what people really need is love. If people talk to me and meet me and then don’t talk to me again, perhaps they got what they needed out of our interaction. Perhaps, even, they really were being jerks. But regardless, it is my privilege to say to them and to myself that it’s okay. I can bless them and let them go. I can allow them to take their spiritual journey through this realm just like I am. And I can withhold my judgment from them just as I hope others will withhold their judgment from me on the occasions that I am inconsiderate to them - maybe even without realizing that I’m being inconsiderate.